1. What were the strengths of your paper? What did you do particularly well, what do you have to be proud of? What are the best elements that you could build on?
After I read some of my peers’ essays, I didn’t think that my paper was exceptionally unique. However, I think that I did particularly well on my sentence fluency and mechanics. I was able to establish sentences that got my points across and also at the same time, made sense. I also noticed a repeating pattern in my teacher’s and peers’ comments that little mistakes could be found in the mechanics area of my essay. Although mechanics isn’t always something that people are proud of, I am elated by the fact that there aren’t many observable mistakes in my paper. Mechanical errors was something that I use to struggle with, therefore, it is a personal accomplishment that I was able to write an essay without many mechanical errors.
2. What are some weaknesses in the paper that you could address?
After I reread my essay, I was shocked by the way I “told” a lot of my stories, instead of “showing” them. A weakness that I think I should address is disability to merge my voice and personality into my essay. Therefore, I wasn’t able to add liveliness into my essay because of this weakness. Another weakness my paper possessed was that I didn’t transition my paragraphs well enough. I need to work to improve transitioning my paragraphs well enough so that it makes sense to the readers.
3. If you had a chance to start this assignment over from scratch, what might you do differently and why?
If I had a chance to start this assignment over from scratch, I think that the two major things I would do differently about my essay is adding transitions and changing my style of writing. Those are my two big weaknesses that really harmed my essay and I would want to fix that first. I want to be able to use smart transitions that make my essay flow smoothly and easier to understand. I would also change my style of writing into more of a story, filled with emotions, voice, and engaging words.
4. What have you learned from this assignment that you could use to be a better writer on future assignments? Choose ONE area of improvement that you really want to focus on for upcoming assignments. What is it? Explain how you can improve on this element of your writing.
To be honest, as I prepared myself to write this “Who Am I?” essay, I didn’t know where to start. It is the first time I had written an essay for school in over two months. However, after Mr. Nollan graded our essays, I was able to catch a glimpse of how essays should be written when he showed a few examples to the class. An area of improvement that I have already mentioned is changing my writing style. This is an area of improvement that I really want to focus on for upcoming assignments and can be achieved by writing in a more story-like style that produces a more lively and interesting paper. I was in awe and envy after reading the examples that were shown to class because they were actually really engaging and fun to read. I think I can improve this more by showing my emotions and voice, rather than just stating it and telling the readers.